The Mother Forker: Sunday Best

This week the Felon had Kindergarten orientation, or Kindergarten coronation as he called it. He got to see his school and meet his classmates. He did a project and rode the bus and left that day on cloud nine. All felt right with the world of Felon. I even blogged on the Mother's Day tea day about how ready he and I both were for him to go off on his own more. Now I take that back. I'm going to start this by saying I am not a helicopter parent who is standing over them and watching their every move. If they have playmates there, then they should be socializing and enjoying themselves. I am always in their general vicinity checking in to make sure no one is hurt and everyone is playing safely. We attended a party for my girlfriend the other night and all of the littles were invited. Our girls are all around the same age and its fun to celebrate milestones together. The felon was about 4 years younger than the boys there. He gets excited to play with the older boys, but had only really done it in a one on one situation. Needless to say there was wrestling and running and aggressive boy energy coming from all the boys and most certainly mine. I struggle at being a boy mom because I don't like this type of playing. I don't want my son throwing anyone around and I don't want anyone doing it to him. When the Alaskan Assassin was finished in the NFL and AFL, I felt like I could breath again. My partner for life was done putting himself in danger. Little did I know that I would have a mini assassin on my hands who gave me heart attacks daily. My husband has a plan on how we are raising the Felon. He doesn't want me constantly yelling at the Felon and redirecting his crazy boy ways. He wants him to be a boy and get hurt sometimes and learn from it. I would like to step in and prevent him from ever being hurt because when he hurts, I hurt. Long story short, there was a nerf war outside where only one of the boys had the bullets and everyone else was either pretending to shoot or physically attacking each other in that "fun playful boy way." I left that supervision to the Alaskan Assassin and stuck around my girls. When we all met back in the car to go home, the Felon was fighting back tears. He doesn't cry or ever tell me anymore if he's hurt and I felt HORRIBLE. At some point all of the older boys ganged up on him and wouldn't let him have a gun and made him the target. My heart hurt so badly for my 5 year old. The Alaskan Assassin told me to chill out and not to baby him. He also told me that he watched the whole thing and did nothing because the Felon needs to learn to stick up for himself. I went to bed mad. I prayed about it and didn't sleep well thinking next year he will be on a bus with older kids and I won't be there to protect him. On the way to church this morning Roo out of no where said that there was another little boy there last night who she saw crying to his mom because the same thing that happened to the Felon happened to him. She said she walked over to him and said hi, but he didn't want to talk to her and I realized that this was my chance to start preparing the Felon. This was my teachable moment to tell him to remember how bad he felt last night and how to make sure he doesn't ever make anyone feel left out. When he goes to school next year, he needs to include and be kind to everyone. If things get out of hand and he feels unsafe, to get away from those people and the situation. To find a safe person to go to. We spoke of loving others as Jesus loves us. Raising boys is not for the faint of heart and I am always up for anyone with older boys who has advice.